Jeffty is Five is one of Harlan Ellison's many masterpieces.
I'm shocked to find it (legally, apparently!) online for free.
This is your excuse to stop working.
Go read it now.
-- via Twitter from johnottinger
The Night I Called Harlan Ellison
Blog Notes: No Blogging Saturday
Harlan Ellison (Again)
Harlan Ellison: Writers Guild Got Screwed!